Powerful spirit . . .


Today was be interesting Friday for me because its began with powerful spirit. First thing which make me cheerful is I have consulted about my Pre-Seminar thesis. I admit that I felt a little disappointed  with the election of me as MIT student because I knew it would be postpone my graduate target on April 2013. But there's nothing more challenging than looking for the experience of studying abroad and of course I will know how the feeling of live in another country.

The Second thing today is because of Songkran day or Thailand new year. I have celebrated that festival with Thailand student and follow their traditions to pelting the water to the older people than them. The Celebration ended with ate Pancake at The Nanny’s. It was be an awsome pancake.

The Third thing is because I got new knowledge at these course. How to interpreting charts, tables, graphs, and diagrams with better and right. Our necessary later is not only speaking but writing also and there will be a lot of academic words that will spoken by lecturer in Malaysia or Thailand. Thus today was awesome, filled of laughter, and I like it.

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Horrible and panic attack . . .

my morning today began with a lot of bbm’s  from lecturers and friends, and full of anxiety about the assignment that has not been done,  although the deadline is still far away, but for sure there’re still assignments, because after the task is completed, there would have another to do. Because I am a student.

Today I was remained to go to english course at balai bahasa for MIT student. Unfortunately we came late because earlier there was a horrible class, but would be more horrible if we did not come to class.

First class meeting for this afternoon was interested enough and increase my enthusiasm for learning. In my mind, I always concerned and said ‘o my god my grammer is really bad’ do I deserve to be in this program? Sometimes I feel less confident, and feel I can not do it. 
That was some negative response from myself.

But surely, where there’s devil there must an angel also. There were  positive responds from the deepest of my heart and stab the negative responds, and my heart told me that ‘ I should, would, indeed, and certainly can do it.  My friends, family, lecturers always support me and believe that I could do the best at all, just need a little spirit for english learning. And now, I am ready to face what will happens. Because I live in this moment and I like it.

That’s all of in my mind, and i know that everything happens for a reason, and the most annoying is waiting or looking for these reasons.

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today was horrible , , ,

Pagi ku hari ini di awali dengan bbm menumpuk dari dosen dan teman dan kecemasan tentang tugas yang belum dikerjakan, meskipun deadlinenya masih jauh, tetap saja selalu ingin cepat beres, karena setelah tugas yang ini selesai, pasti bakal ada tugas yang lain lagi yang menyusul untuk dikerjakan. Karena saya seorang mahasiswa.

Hari ini saya sudah diingatkan untuk pergi les bahasa inggris untuk anak-anak MIT.  Bagi yang belum tau, MIT adalah program pertukaran pelajar antara Malaysia-Indonesia-Thailand. Sayangnya kami datang  agak sedikit terlambat karena sebelumnya ada kelas yang sangat-sangat mengerikan namun akan sangat mengerikan jika tidak hadir dalam kelas itu.

Pertemuan pertama untuk kelas sore tadi cukup menarik dan meningkatkan semangat belajar.  Dalam benak saya, saya selalu prihatin dan bilang ‘o my god my grammer is really suck’ layak gak sih gue disini? kadang sedikit minder juga dan ragu gue bisa apa engga. Itu respon negatif dari diri saya.

Tapi ya dimana ada devil disana pasti ada malaikat. Respon positif dari hati juga selalu muncul menikam respon negatif, dan berkata ‘saya harus, akan, memang, dan pasti bisa’.
Teman-teman, keluarga, dan dosennya selalu memotivasi dan percaya bahwa saya bisa melakukannya dengan baik, hanya perlu sedikit semangat lagi untuk lebih memahami dan menguasai bahasa inggris. And now, saya siap menghadapi apa yang akan terjadi.  because i live in this moment and i like it.

Itulah yang terpikir dalam benak saya hari ini, Dan saya tahu bahwa everything happens for a reason. dan yang paling menyebalkan adalah menunggu dan mencari alasannya tersebut.

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save the best for the last . . .

hai,
long time no see u in my laptop, sorry my blog :)

i'm so dizzy, why so serious?

i'm adult enough, 21th left .  . .

it's about my secret admirer or my 'ex' or my expect mates?

why they're have an 'i' for the last of his name, it's almost at all . .
it'a a regulation for me? or it's a clue maybe to found some one an 'i'?

Let's talk it and list,hehe

on my elementary school there was my 'ex', name: A*i
ever like me name: Y**i
ever like me name: H***A
on my junior high shool my  'ex' name: A**i
on my senior high scool my 'ex' name: R***y
on my senior high school my 'ex' name: P***i
ever like me name: S***i
and my secret admirer til now name: A*i'
ever like me name: D**i
on my college, ever like me name: *******A
ever like me name: ***A
ever like me name: ******A
ever like me name: ****i
ever like me name: *****y
ever like me  name: ***i
my secret admirer  name: ****i 
my secret admirer  name: ****i

I have a longer relationship for each person, maybe 1 or 2 or 3 years,

so i didn't have many 'ex', hehe . . .
and when it's broken, it's hurt enough, because i built it long enough
with a patient and a trust, but the time showing all the right. . .

but know, is there still an 'i' for my next?

but i have some secret admirer, but i don't like them now
i looking for my last love surely, husband . . .
because i'm nota kid anymore, it's time to serious
my dream shusband or my ideal man is on consonant last name just now . . .
just my expectation, i respect and like them :)
i think they're almost perfect, can walk together with me and teach me . . .

but at all i don't know how far is my destiny,

i just try be the best for my self, and i sure, there's some one for me,
i don't know who my soulmate later
did they? which comes from the past?
friends that I know now?
or a person in one day is already waiting for me?
i don't know, but I still pray the best
who cared for me as it is, my family, my life and certainly understand what and how i'm
because God always save the best fo the last . . .

tengs God, u always blessing e til now,

i love u more than anything, Thank you Allah . . .

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